Thar She Blows Edition

Reporter: "Mr. President, Prime Minister Blair has been very active during the current crisis, as has Secretary of State Rice. How would you rate her work on Hezbollah?"
Bush: "Well, I can't speak fer Tony, but from personal experience I can tell y'all that Condi here's got a real soft touch. She is a peni--, a pianister--, uh, a piano player after all. And the way she starts off by working the shaft a little, like so, before she just gently cups the ol' oil reserves down there, well, ah'll tell y'all, Jed Clampett ain't never found near as much Texas T as ol' Condi here."