They Shocked Santa's Balls Edition

Saddam Hussein, alleging torture at the hands of his American captors in court today, tried to downplay his own reputation: "I mean, sure, I might have shocked some people's balls, but these bastards made me watch 'Live with Regis & Kelly' videos for hours! Then they gave me this cheap-ass suit to wear in court and put photos of me changing clothes in my cell on the internet. That kind of thing really hurts a guy's reputation."