Reading is Fundamenial Edition

1. It turned out that New Orleans had actually submitted a plea for assistance directly to the president, but due to the fact that he's less of a "visual learner" than most previous presidents, their call for help was assumed to be "some kinda Negroid gang markings."
2. In an effort to shore up flagging support for the Iraq War, President Bush pointed to this photo today, saying, "See, the Eye-rackis do want us there. They are asking for our help, and we will give it to them. That's what I call 'compassionate conservatism.'" The President then looked confused, as an embarassed Scott McClellan could be heard whispering "New Orleans! New Orleans!" from the side of the stage.